These are the titles of the threads that have been springing up on Pattaya web forums for over 8 years in my personal experience and sometimes we have bouts of them as recently.
Most of the members that start the threads seem to fit in one or more of the categories.
Non-drinkers, non-Thai speakers, lackadaisical, scared of changed, married off, don’t drink, avoid nightlife and most importantly, their salaries/income hasn’t changed the same % as Pattaya prices inflating, therefore they can no longer have access to everything they want or did before – for instance if they are now married off and decide to be faithful, the biggest draw of Pattaya has gone missing, so they visit Pattaya and complain that its changed beyond there expectations. There are guys that fit most those categories, but they don’t complain, so there is no issues. The perspective of Pattaya lies in the hands of the person visiting and their personal nature. Guys that are having lots of sex with lots of beautiful girls don’t notice the holes in the foot path or the police fining people 200 baht for traffic offences, these minor issues all become irrelevant, with such major sexual benefits. Take away this huge pussy benefit, the focus shifts to more trivial things. This theory is proven in some bars, you can have the shittiest bar and the worst toilet ever, but with the right girls, no one gives a rats ass.
Breaking habitual routines and patterns.
Due to our survival nature of familiarity and the comfortability of feeling safe, alot of us become so predictable and thats not always a word thats particularly associated with fun. For example most guys search porn on a daily basis, they use the same site as they trust it, however they tend to search the same search terms and end up getting disappointed with the same visual content, i.e perhaps try searching “thais” instead of “thai” and “asians” instead of “asian” all of a sudden you are faced with a whole new page of unseen content and your perspective is so much different from just adding one letter to your the end of your daily search term.
Alot of people I notice like to sit in the same seat when they visit a bar, or at least in the same bar, but this is a familiar view, and your restricting your experiences as the guys that come often like to be in a familiar environment where they have everything they need and feel safe, and I find the older the guy, the more likely they get stuck in a routine or rut. But it becomes to the stage they are faced with the same stimuli and it can become more mudane and gets less fun every time, all of a sudden you stop noticing whats going on in blind spots.
People think that some people are more prone to luck or are more prone to see things, well the truth is that the lucky person takes more opportunities and has more belief in things, the person that tends to see more, spends more time outside and breaks his routine. The opportunist type person is less likely to get the doom and gloom syndrome. Check out this derren brown social experiment involving some people being more lucky or not, they are simply more opportunistic.
I personally try to drive a different way to Soi 6 everyday, I do my best to sit in different seats and I get bored of areas and start visiting other areas, it shakes up my life and keeps Pattaya interesting, simple things like using a different bathroom in the house with a better view, turning the wrong way down a soi by purpose, a bit like randomising your daily routine to see things that you have never seen before.
I was actually thinking of doing a game board for Pattaya, so people can roll a dice or something and they can let the game choice what they are going to do that night. Here are a few combination ideas of random nights for some.
– Visit one beer bar complex across Pattaya and spend the night bouncing from one bar to the other.
– Spend the night on beach road, drinking and mongering, its a whole new world down there of social systems.
– Go to one random bar and spend the whole day/night there, your night grows with the atmosphere and as you drink with others, you stay on the same wave length. I always find staying as a group and increasing the level of alcohol intake at the same time of others means that you are on the same thought level and you all get along better, nothing worse than being sober and walking into a bar of drunken people, vica versa.
– Spend the night in a disco and look for a good pair of freelancers that want to go together.
– Spend the night finding a girl that started work for the first time that day and take her out to eat and make her first time better,
– Spend the night in the hotel shagging
– Take a group of girls back to the hotel and get drunk and see what you can get up to.
– play games with wingmen, select the number of the gogo girl you want, before you walk in
– Sit in pattaya beer garden and wait for freelancer to come and go and choose one
– Explore Naklua
– Explore the darkside
– Spend 2 nights in Ban Chang, where you truly get full long time
– Spend a day trying to get a girl from 7eleven
– Where a monkey suit, with paper cards for drinks and walk to all your normal bars anonymously
The land of sexual freedom.
I feel that the most appealing thing about the nature of Pattaya, is that you can walk down almost any soi and pick up a girl in the street, shop, bar, restaurant and you can be having sex with her within minutes due to hotels being near, without this benefit, Pattaya seems a harder place to deal with. Those that are now faithful or can’t afford it, now have to relie on other things to entertain themselves (most of them can be done in the UK) they can see friends, go cinema, sit on the beach or spend time with the wife….. visit the many restaurants, but they have to try and shake all that up as much as possible, over 1000 restaurants at least to discover. There just doesn’t seem to be anything as unique and appealing as having unlimited sex in any location at any time at a low honest price. Some guys that can’t afford short times or are faithful start to milk the appeal of knowingly having it available if they want it, pretending to chat up girls, take numbers and act like they are going to do it, I think we all enjoy the fact that its available even if we dont use it, a bit like buying a boat.
Also this is a place where most sexual fantasies can be orchestrated and its the place to find out what truly turns you on the most. This is where you can do role play, dress her up and have group sex sessions with several girls. Lots of experimenting to be had, so if your not good or comfortable at socialising and drinking the night away, you could be the dark horse that is running around, shagging all the girls.
Breaking the language barrier.
The most common factor with people getting jaded with Thai people and Thailand, is the communication barrier, if you smash through that barrier, there are more levels and you can keep smashing them. You will get more respect of Thai people and they will help you out more. I remember watching the tsunami in Phuket on UK tv as it unfolded, i was at college the next day and some of the comments were apauling, because they are all unconnected, disassociated and far removed from Thailand, they seem them as poor people and worthless, this is what happens from a lack of understand, disassociation and seemingly far different than our race, one chat with a victimised family in a common language, would have seen them sympathetic, sad and willing to help. I feel when you can talk Thai to a Thai person, you become humanised and attract sympathy and empathy etc. The more you can remind someone of yourself to them selves the better, we all have common interests and its a good talking point to find common interests and values, because without sharing those values we would become argumentive friends. I get frustrated when I cannot communicate, but i remind myself where i am and its my fault I am not fluent.
Depression and Complaining
I had a bout of depression when I was younger and after 2-3 years of suffering, I found the answer, I had too much time to think and I was making no progress in life. Ever since then I am pushing to progress or I will start to get depressed, I am fighting to go forward to run away from depression coming back and it works. Sometimes I see someone complain about such a trivial thing that happens in Pattaya and reading between the lines, they have too much thinking time or not enough real problems and sometimes I become envious of there life. My answer to the moaners or the guys that are sadly depressed, is to make positive action and help other people and you will naturally get help back. Don’t have time to think and be someone that is needed or relied on. Some people don’t have a good way with other humans, so they will feed homeless dogs to feel needed. For those that consider suicide, as a last resort, ask someone to keep hold of all your stuff, shave your head and go straight to a temple, get your brain cleansed with meditation and give a year of your life to the temple until you have regained composure, it may seem extreme but its far better than killing yourself. I am sure everyone has been curious enough to consider suicide while in a bad place in life, but the difference between doing it and thinking about it is so little in physical action, but the difference in consequences is very extreme. One of the only upsides of divorce or a partner dying is actually having the opportunity to having a second life, it doesnt feel right saying it that way, but you cant dwell on the past, you have to look forward, and for those standing on the balcony of a condo considering it, should realise that this is there opportunity to have a second life and fall in the arms of Buddhism, I am not buddhist but i believe in most of the concepts, idioms and way of life, nothing bad can come from it.
Familiarity Breeds Contempt
The more we learn about Pattaya, the more faults we will find, so if you don’t want to ruin the dream for yourself, you don’t need to look at the crime news on a daily basis, its good to stay realistic but looking out for the daily suicides will associate it with what Pattaya is for you. Our innate ability to pick and find faults can sometimes get out of control, some of us like to dig deeper and find stuff that is pretty negative, whereas we could spend our time looking up and planning some positive ideas for Pattaya.
Their will always be Thai brothels, their will always be no large hikes in prices, always lots of restaurants, always cheap accomodation, always freelancers…. there is never gonna be any real doom for consumers, the business owners will face the most losses and problems. The law can’t stop girls being available, the biggest losses we will have is no nudity in the gogos, but only if consumers stop supporting them, the fact that there is 12% more gogos in Pattaya over the last 12 months, means that the customer base is saturated, which will increase prices in lots of the smaller gogos. Its become a market that has grown too fast and there will be financial casualties. Due to the competition, the agency are driving the salary prices up to par and the drink prices have no choice but to go up, from that perspective, its gone crazy..
Make a change and leave a mark
From buying a park bench, donating time, helping out a community, teaching computer lessons, volenteering your time, passing on your specialised skills, these are all positive things to leave your mark on the community, the day you die in Pattaya, you will be noted as being someone only if you do something, if you don’t do much, sadly your just another sex pest. (despite your work history back home) I see the news reports daily …. a brtish family man leaving two children behind dies….. or its … a male died in his guest house room (no interest or eyebrows raised) they are both probably mongerers. (who cares what the news says? well some of us leaving respectable family behind do)
There are alot of guys here with not much to do and some fall into the night life trap, start complaining about prices and realise that its not as much fun as it used to be, because its become familiar and predictable. I always think its a good idea to work or have some sort of project, I have spoke to older guys and they say they have done there time, which is completely fine, but if they start complaining about Pattaya, its time to get involved in a hobby or some sort of project.
When I was younger the guys that i inspired up to, were the ones that visited several countries and had interesting stories to tell, then i soon realised it cost them with relationships, so I suddenly realised that it seems like we only have one life, and to have another life, our only chance is a second marriage or a second lot of children, some guys should think about that if there money situation allows, its time to have a second life and leave a mark on Thailand, even with just having one child, it means your more welcome here than most, the Thais take your more seriously and more important, you are ‘time rich’ to bring up and shape the child, its far easier to bring up a child here as there are people everywhere willing to help.
For the dynamic business owner, its time to start considering options such as getting in with the tour groups and fixing a contract with them, or to focus on other country languages also. Or even to become a landlord and let other people worry about adapting to the changing climate. Pattaya cannot change as fast as people make out, because there are lots of contracts, price fixing and stuff going on. I find the biggest problem is landlords increasing prices but refuse to back down from them, so there locations become difficult to make money and people get fed up and move on to a different area, but then in the different area, the landlords there notice and the prices shoot up. However the landlords will never back down on price IMO, these guys are actually causing areas to change in popularity, as business owners seek cheaper pastures, the only way to combat this is for us to start buying our own freeholds.
The agencies have spotted a market with the hotter girls, they have expolited there laziness and lack of willingness to commit to salaries, they can now do 10 day shifts at a time in various places, it makes life easier for them, the down sides are the girls that leave current gogo jobs to join them, the plus sides are the girls that decide to work on these conditions alone, and wouldn’t have otherwise. The only way we can combat the prices that girls are asking is by reducing all salaries accoss all gogos, as it always seems the price of rodgering a girl, is relative to her salary.
For the dynamic tourist there are several more options to discover and try, such as breaking routines, learning more thai, earn more money at work, (or just change) save money by alternating your nights out and nights in. Use cheaper accomodation and spend more on the girls etc. We have to adapt to our income and current prices. Using different areas such as dark side, Ban Chang, naklua, thai discos, thai kareokes, free lancing areas, you could even try chasing russian girls.
Branding and reputation
The guys that spend 10 minutes of their life starting a thread complaining about the end of Pattaya are actually hurting the reputation and branding of Pattaya, its actually going to make people to expect a bad time, I hear people saying they walk into a gogo and it was boring, its the business owners constant battle to get the atmosphere going, it costs time, experience and money, it does come naturally with plying customers with shots and slowly increasing the music, but its down to the customer to interact with each other and the girls or even buy a round of drinks for the girls or throw some balls, people that say that Pattaya is doomed, never declare the fact that they are now in a relationship, or broke, or faithful or have a shocking bad experience etc.
I know the guys that start these doom and gloom threads, do not intend to hurt Pattaya, as they clearly previously loved the town for the mongering aspect and freedom, but for the sake of the rest of us active mongerers, please keep coming to Pattaya and encourage other friends from home, please break your routines, get back to the basics of Pattaya and do some back street mongering, add a positive spin, competitions, arrange a bar crawl, make a party in a random bar, increase your visits, bring some newbies, start an annual event, if you love Pattaya, please help it. If you are looking for answers to why you seem to think Pattaya is doomed,. hopefully I have answered it above.
If they build casinos as they once wanted to do, the place will be crime ridden and I think the main focus wouldn’t be mongering, but we may see a new breed of tourists and new wealth being invested, But for me, it would ruin the vibe. More suicides and broken people.
Its been said that walt disney have ideas of opening a park in Pattaya, its also been said that they already have the land ready. Nothing will stop these guys, there is too much money involved for people at the top and people running the country. Once they feel the image is better they may go for it, this will probably send the mongering scene out of town. I could see in 20 years time, all the mongering out on the darkside, with regular tourists all over Pattaya. With many buildings empty.